Strangers, again

Nice to meet you again, blog! My only salvation when I have no idea on what to do, anymore.

She used to be my everything. A girl that's got brains, looks and above of all this, maturity.
A girl I thought that could never exist.

Every relationship goes through stages. Where and how each stage develops is ultimately up to each person. While we always hope for the best, we often can't avoid the inevitable.

1. The Meeting
All thanks to a good friend of mine, Amanda, I met this incredible girl. It all started when I got a call from her when I was working in Mid Valley, saying that she's with a friend in Zara and asked me to come look for them. Well, until today, I don't know if my decision that day on going down was right. But, I still did. Went over to Zara and we introduced each other and had a really long chat along the way, following the girls to window shop. I even had my very first cup of Gong Cha on that day and lost my phone cover after they've left. She gave me a really strong impression on how talkative she can be by keeping up with my conversation. Knowing me, once I start talking, you never never see the end of it :/

After that day, Tiesto was in town. I am not a fan of rave but somehow, I attended it because I knew she was going. I got her number from Amanda and actually asked her if she have anymore tickets to spare and thank god, she did!

From that day onwards, we headed over to the next phase. Some says it is the best part of a relationship, but I feel that it is the hardest phase to be in.


2. The Chase
While on the way to Tiesto, we were texting. As we all have experience, smiling and laughing retarded to yourself while reading a text message isn't exactly a thing you should do infront of your friends. But, I still did. Cally kept asking who I was texting and kept on teasing me until I finally told her who I was actually texting. That night was amazing. Not the music, but her.

After that night, we could never stop texting and calling each other. She's the only one I felt I needed to talk to. Even when I was playing dota, or with the boys, or smoking up or being in a management meeting, we just couldn't stop. If either of us stop texting, one would call.

We finally went on our first date during Christmas. I had everything planned out so well that I couldn't see how it will fall apart. But somehow, I panicked a few days before. My perfect plan suddenly seem so fragile. I lost confidence on myself. But I put myself together and went through it. Didn't exactly go accordingly but it'll do :D We talked about our self and shared almost everything with each other. It just never felt so right with someone, it is almost wrong.
I took everything slowly. Step by step. Things was going favorably to me
As our relationship started, we then took it to the next stage

3. The Honeymoon.

This is the time when we show each other what we've got by sharing our emotions with each other. Surprises came one after another and things were so perfect we though we are going to be each other's last. We talk about almost everything, even marriage. We do everything we always wanted to do as a couple together.

By the end of everything, we entered the stage where every long term relationship would go.

4. Comfortable
This is a stage where most of the couple make their biggest mistake in life. Taking each other for granted isn't exactly the thing to do. I took her for granted when I thought she would understand what I was going through at that time. Blinded by my own foolishness and selfishness, I did not take into consideration, her feelings.
I've uttered too many things to hurt her, so much that only she could still bare it with me. I just couldn't realise it at that point.

Things happened so gradually, I didn't even see it coming. I was stupid.

5. The breakup
After tons of fights and most of them, I don't even remember what it was about. But then, we couldn't reach an agreement that we can both deal with. Hence, I had to let her go. Things wasn't easy for us. We kept trying and trying but the timing was just never right anymore. I couldn't mend the holes I've left in her heart.

I just couldn't get her off my mind. Memories of us haunts me every night. Getting a proper sleep is almost impossible to me. I wish I could turn back time and just make things right again for us but nevertheless, what's done is done.